Back to work :(

So today is my last day of maternity leave.  I start back to work this Monday.  I can't believe it's already time to head back to school and it makes me very sad that it is over.  I've so enjoyed spending each and every day with my baby girl!  Looking back I think the hardest time was the first 4-6 weeks of her life.  It's such an adjustment phase that overwhelms your mind and body.  You're overwhelmed with excitement and love for this new, little being in your life, but you're also trying to figure out how to function on less sleep, how to figure out what to do when she cries, and manage your house, mentality, and family.  It's definitely an adjustment, but seeing where we are now I wouldn't change a thing!  Eliza has been such a blessing to our family and brings so much joy and love to our house.

I have quite a bit of anxiety knowing that I won't be spending each and every minute watching her smile and laugh, holding her while she sleeps, and taking trips or walks with her.  We are blessed to have an amazing woman to watch her, who lives right behind my school (within walking distance).  I'm sure some of you are thinking..."well you're so close it can't be that hard," but its just the thought of missing out on her life (during the day).  I plan on going there during my lunch break to nurse her and of course spend my hour with her.  I know that will help me get through the rest of my day.

So needless to say, I'm dreading Monday.  I don't plan on putting any mascara on til after I get to school as I know I would just have black lines streaming down my face until that point.  I plan on bringing pictures to help me and of course show those who ask.  I keep telling myself I have 47 days (but who's counting--ME!) of school before summer break when we can enjoy more time together.  I know so many women have done what I'm getting ready to encounter and have made it just fine.  I just have to get through the first week or so and I know I will be back in the swing of things.  I love what I do and have missed my kiddos at school, but so enjoy spending my time with Liza.

The ache in my heart will pass, but for now I will just continue to deal with the large lump in my throat as I hold back (if I can) my tears and enjoy my weekend with my little family.  Please keep me in your prayers come Monday and next week as I could use some extra love, support, and encouragement to get through it.

How could you not want to spend EVERY.WAKING.SECOND with this adorable and amazing baby girl!  I love you Eliza Marie!